Difficulties show men what they are. In case of any difficulty God has
pitted you against a rough antagonist that you may be a conqueror, and
this cannot be without toil. ~ Epictetus
these are my field of dreams

My beautiful daughter Desiree Sophile 
Lynn Little Waterfall Standley
ddTo live a creative life, 
ddwe must lose our fear 
ddof being wrong. 

ddJoseph Chilton Pearce


My granddaughters Ella and Tatum

my son the coach, Lance Standley

So I came to Hollywood in 1987, with my daughter Desiree in a 1969 GMC truck with a
camper on the back.  We brought Dez's cat RAINBOW STARLIGHT THE GYPSY ROAD
CAT.   We settled out in Malibu on the land of my friend Erin, she has over 300 acres
and just set up a outside camp with my camper and a little trailer to live in.

"You're a high-priced lawyer! If I give you $500, will you answer two questions for me?"
"Absolutely! What's the second question?"

Stories to tell  EATIN' DUST...

Bob Banner and all his Emmys and Peabody awards

The Ranchero Boys


Corrie Pacific

Time out while I run from Gangsters and have two children and my wife
has a couple of affairs and then leaves me taking my  kids...meanwhile
back at the ranch and during this time:

My Mother dies
My Brother dies of Aids
My Step Father dies and the will is forged by gangsters lawyers
My real Father dies
My grandmother dies
Two of my best friends die

Mad Max and if you can't fuck your friends who can you fuck...and ridin'
the Jimmie Rodgers train southbound to the cleaners.

"Talent borrows. Genius Steals."   T.S. Eliot

So there we were on the side of a mountain so high we could see all the way to Catalina
Island.  It did not rain in LA for five years, so I just set up a couch outside and had chairs
overlooking a cliff that could see down to my nearest neighbor Barbara Streisdan.   I
would stop by this carpet store in Santa Monica where I could get rolls of carpet out of
the dumpster...I'm an ole Dipsy Dumpster Diver from way back...I could take these rolls
of carpet and had the outside around my camper and trailer carpeted.  I ran a telephone
wire for some 300 yards, so I was in business.  Had all the candles I needed and rigged
up a little kitchen area out site.

On one of my visits to 20 Century Fox trying to sell my projects, my tuck broke down.  I
had it towed back out to Malibu and parked it on the side of the mountain.  The camper
was my bedroom and the trailer next to that was where I set my my office.  I will always
look back on these times living there and having my daughter with me as some of the
best time in my life.  Dez and I would go on the road an sell jewelry with the Grateful
Dead to sell jewelry.  I could at times go down to Venice beach and set up and sell
some things to make my day to day living.

I begin to see in all the traffic while I see so many car wrecks on TV and in the movies
Everywhere you go there are cars cars cars.  I am sure with all the life in a car and on
the freeways, every Hollywood writer goes home and sets at the typer or computer and
starts to dream up an idea and a car wreck comes to mind.  Monkey see money do.

I was getting ready to begin the workings of Hollywood and how the sharks swim in
the business slime.  Going to learn about the lawyers and the agents.  I must say that
after all the years as a producer working with folks like Emmylou Harris, Chris Kris-
tofferson, Hoyt Axton, Michael Martin Murphey, Jerry Jeff and the rest of the Austin,
Texas gang, but somewhere down the road the road I learned about trust and a hand
shake, or a deal written on a bar napkin.

Q:What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?
A: One is a bottom-dwelling, garbage-eating scavenger.  The other is a fish.

"It's a fifty-fifty deal.  Just make sure we get the best of it."  Samuel Golden

One of my first experiences in the "schooling fee" of doin' and being done-in and
being done-by Hollywood was with the TV producer Bob Banner.  Banner produced
and created Star Search and Solid Gold.  He had more Peabody and Emmy
Awards than you could shake a stick at.  I took him my  KICKING UP DUST
project.  Kicking Up Dust KUD, was a music anthology on the history of the music
business that I had been writing and researching on since 1983, while writing a
story on the history of the Austin, Texas music scene.  It is in fact the dream to
bring this to the TV and video world that took me to Hollywood, not unlike Kermit
the Frog.  If fact Kermit knew more about the biz that I had any idea.

After a few pitches to the Banner team a deal began to come together.  There were
a number of meetings at their Beverly Hills office.  Then there were the lawyers and
several months of drawing up a deal.  Near the end of the dealing I was called in
for a meeting and Desiree was playing and having fun with her pals in Malibu.  I
went to get her to come and get ready for the meeting and she argued and said
that she wanted to stay.  I could not leave her and talked her into going with me.
The meeting had gone on for an hour and Dez would just set on the couch being
a great girl, reading her book and drawing.  Then at one point in the meeting some-
one said, "A million dollars."  Dez jumped up from the couch and yelled..."A
million dollars."  The room had a great laugh.

The walking down the hall after the meeting I told Dez, see that was not so bad.
She said, "Dad, they didn't give us any money...we could have done this on the
phone.  Weeks later we went back up to meet with them and I let them hand Dez
the $5,000.00 payment on the deal.  I was given an office there in Beverly Hills
and I thought...wow we are off to the races.

Welper, a year went by and Banner did not do anything on the project.  We sent
out letter and worked on getting the talent together and other things, but the guy
that headed up the projects for Mr. Banner was not real excited with the show,
he was gay and had a few other ideas and something country and western in
nature did not fit in his realm of likes.  Don't guess he knew there is a Gay rodeo.

Imagination is thinking of something that hasn't been on TV.

So, between the first meetings with the Banner organization and the fact that I
had to get a lawyer to write a letter to get the project back near two years went
by.  Meanwhile back at the ranch...

Working on KUD I had become friends with the old Arizona Cowboy star Rex
Allen.  Rex told me about a around up of ole singing cowboys that was going to
happen in Las Vegas at the ole Union Plaza hotel.  So Desiree and I timed a
trip to Montana for her to see her mom, with a stop off in Vegas.  We arrived and
hung with Rex and got to not only meet Dale Warren from the Sons of the
Pioneers, but I met Buck Page.  Buck was the founding member of the Riders
of the Purple Sage.  We have been friends for years now, after meeting back
in 1989.

Forget her name, but friend I was telling
my ventures with the FBI, CIA, US Justice
Dept, Texas Rangers and the Texas
House and Senate working on child care
legislation, she says she knows Thomas
Steinbeck,  son of writer John Steinbeck,
and asks if I would like to meet him.

I say sure, and we became saddle pals.

Thomas Steinbeck &  Buffalo Benford

We became partners hawking our dream projects in the streets of Hollywood.
He was very interested in Kicking Up Dust and jumped in the band wagon.  He
met Buck and I met his lawyer friend Phillip.  Everyone had some great times
together going to parties in Malibu out on the land that I lived in my camper.
There were many great friendships that were born at these picking parties that
I was having.  There was always music at the parties.  Many times ole Buck
would bring his guitar and we would have a blast with this ole cowboy legend.

Down the road Buck found a couple of his pals from his riding group.  Pres.
Regan was a member of the group.  Anymoo, one of the guys was the Attorney
General of Idaho and the other was John Simplott, Jr. and his dad was one of
the richest men in the U.S.  His dad owned the patent on the frozen french fry,
had big cattle ranches and sold beef and potatoes to MacDonalds.  We all
met, including Thom and Phillip Rosen regarding these boys putting up one
million dollars for us to produce Kicking Up Dust.

I thought sheeeezam, I have to construct a deal tight enough for a Attorney
General to look at the deal.  I knew I needed big time law firm to look good and
do the job right.

The problems with lawyer jokes is that
   1. lawyers don't think they're funny and,
   2. the rest of us don't think they're jokes!
I get Mickey Slobodian.  He is Dolly Parton's lawyer, the LA Rams, and HBO.  He
was John Wayne's lawyer.  Buck, Thom and I meet him and he loves the project
and we have to put up a $6,000 retainer.  Buck puts up the money.  So, now
months have passed since the first meetings with the Ranchero boys and then the
months it takes the law firm to draw up a $1 million Limited Partnership agree-
ment.  We send the agreement to the boys.  A month passes.  We get a letter
back that they don't think they are going to be able to invest.  Buck finds out that
John Simplot's dad did not want him to get into any business in Hollywood.

Again, a deal goes down the tubes.  Now near 3 years have gone by.  As we
used to say in Austin, Texas  ONWARD  THROUGH THE FOG.

So during these times I continue to research and meet old cowboys.  Had the
honor to meet Roy Rogers, Patsy Montana, Gene Aurty, Eddie Dean.  I feel more
and more dedicated to pulling off getting a great story that I am digging up told.
I am learning that no one in history has ever gotten all these old cowboys and
cowgirls together to perform on the same stage
Had a meeting one time with a guy from CBS and telling him about the project
and he tells me it is too "dusty" to rural.  No one cares about the past.  They want
to know about what is now and the hot trends.  They want action packed.  I say to
myself, okay Mr. car wreck blow it up tits and ass butt hole.

The more I research and talk to the ole singing cowboys and pioneers of the music
business in this country and look at the lives of the icons, I begin to see an inter-
esting evolution of the music business running side by side and being "spurred"
along by the new technological inventions of the times.  I see this as a more inter-
esting setting for the story.

 “A lawyer is a liar with a permit to practice.”
Two deal began to evolve with Kicking Up Dust.  I have 
been in talks with some folks that have a company called
Corrie Pacific.  They have been in the biz and we come
to some terms on a deal.  I get a $10,000 advance from
them and put most of the money into a house in Beverly
Hills that once was a ole horse stable for the John 
Trusdale.  There was two acres of land with the place.
I was going to make it the home office for me and the
production.  I had two dear that hung out on the land,
and there were Japanese gardens, bamboo forests,
trails and trees, it was up a canyon just a wild to the
Rainbow and other hot clubs on the Sunset Strip.  I
could stumble home from nights on the town...
One day my pal Thom Steinbeck and I were at the ranch in the Hills of Beverly and our
Ponca Indian brother Dan was over at the place.  He was working on a project with
Kevin "Dances With Wolves" Costner.  He had his laptop computer and was showing
us CD-Roms...I looked at Thom and said, "Far out...I got an Indian showing me the most
high tech thing I have ever seen.  And speaking of Oklahoma brothers...and quoting my
ole Okie brother Gary P. Nunn..."I might have been born yesterday, but I stayed up late
last night."  I saw the future...I saw this as the perfect format for Kicking Up Dust
The jungle around the house was
incredible, you thought you were out
in the country, there were hawks
flying over the house and two dear
that lived on the land.  The plants
and trails were incredible...There
were some great trails throught the
two acreas to hike and set...was
a dream place to take a date for a

I was having thoughts that this could be the way I could get my ducks in a row.  I began
to study CD roms.  I found out that IBM was one of the leaders in developing the format.
I was doing all I could do to learn how I could adapt my project to this new form of media.
I soon contact IBM and they are interested in the project.  I put my associate New York
lawyer pal in New York on the project.  One year later and IBM invites us to Las Vegas
for a celebration steak dinner at a big steak house at Ceasar's Palace.  We drink and
toast to a done deal.  Buck and his wife go to the dinner.

I get back to la la land and within weeks of the "done deal" I get a letter that due to a new
move from the new president of IBM they are going to close the software development
division that we had cut our deal with.  That deal goes down the tubes.  In the same
month that IBM goes south the Corrie Pacific deal goes South for reasons never
explained.  The parties that had given us $10 grand just disappeared.  I might mention
that one time asking one of the parties involved who is the key investor, and he said all
you need to know is that she  had an office in the basement of the White House next to
Ollie North's office.  Dum-de-dum-dum?  Go figure.

Things get more difficult in that I have moved into this very expensive house because I
had a signed agreement that the backing would come through.  Money problems
began to mount.  I am having many parties at the house there in the Hills of Beverly.  I
could not afford to furnish the house, so on Thursday mornings which I learned was
trash day in Beverly Hills, so I would go out in the neighborhood and find things that
the rich would set out for the trash to carry off.  I swear you can not believe what the
throw away.  One man's junk is another's riches.  I decorated the house in what I called
early Quervo...we saved all the Quervo bottles from the parties...

I figured that one way to eat good and drink was to have the parties and make them
pot luck.  So after a party I would have all these great left overs to eat for a few days.
If a weekend was coming up and I wanted to have a date, it was always best to just
invite a lady over for a party and my 2 acre rancho.  I had a sauna at the place, swim-
ming pool and with the great wooded area it was fun to sauna with a lady friend then
go hike nude in the woods.  Friend Cindy and I called it Buck Naked in Beverly Hills.

I had a guest house on the property
and had my saddle pal Steinbeck 
move in the house.  He had a rat in
there he called Waylon, after Waylon 
Jennings.  Said the rat would come 
out anytime he played some of Waylon's 
music.  While Thom was in the place he 
wrote a script to The Pearl, the book by
his dad, Senor John Steinbeck.

Eartha Kit owned the house years ago and James Baldwin the writer lived there with
her when he was writing and hiding out from the FBI.  I was living a life of the wild
Hollywood edge.  Had more girls that I was dating than you could shake a stick at.
It was a time in my life that I was wanting to be more like Hunter Thompson and I
had a party pad to back it up.  There was enough drugs and booze being brought
to the house via parties and enough girls staying over night that I did not have to go
out that often.

Looking back these were some of the fun wild times I ever had in Hollyweird.  As I
mentioned I could just walk from the house to the Sunset Strip and some of the hot
hot clubs in Hollywood and then bring folks home to party at the place after.


If I did need to go out I was just a walk from the 
Rainbow, The Whisky and the Roxy and Bar
One, where Heidi Fleiss was working her girls.
Had a chance to set at booth with her and a
hot deadhead friend Erin.  Will always rem-
ember the night I got to kiss the very drunk
Shannon Daugherty, to tell you the truth she
kissed me.  I must say that having a big house
in Beverly Hills sure can help when it comes to

getting girls to stay the night.  Not better place 
to have a date come over and have her stop
and pick up a glass of wine.  Build a fire in the
fire place and have a bottle of wine.  And having
a sauna is the best way there is to have a girl
to just take her clothes off...and before long 
nude in the pool.  yeeeeehaw

Youth is happy because it has the ability to see beauty. 

Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never
grows old.   Franz Kafka

My deadhead friend Erin

"Almost every [Hollywood movie] project has a certain amount of litigation," says
Arthur Rockwell, entertainment analyst for a Los Angeles brokerage firm. "When you
consider the amount of money in these movies, the number of people involved, and
the litigiousness of American society, it is understandable."

Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear. The first lawyer
immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them
on.The second lawyer looked at him and said, "You're crazy! You'll never be able to
outrun that bear!"

"I don't have to," the first lawyer replied. "I only have to outrun you."